Be your most authentic self.
I have grown to understand that not everyone will like you everywhere you go. If you are authentic about who you are then you are more likely to gain real friends and earn their respect. No one likes a self serving faker. We have all met those people that work so hard to sell themselves as being Gods gift to the world. It is very apparent when they cant live up to the junk they have sold. These are the people that walk into the room and make sure everyone around knows they are there. They often times will boast about their abilities and accomplishments and never let anyone get a word in edgewise. A practical example would be the "business consultant" or "life coach" that has never had practical business experience and who has a personal life that is falling apart. Practical business experience goes way beyond just being an employee for a company. It consists of actually being effective at your job and having the skill set to exceed goals and create something special with your skills. If as a consultant you are going to guide others to be the best at what they do, then you should actually have the knowledge and tools to get them to that level, not just promote that you do. To be a "life coach" means you are going to be guiding and molding someone into their greatest example of themselves. How can you do that if you can't even follow your own tools, apparent because your life is in shambles? It is all a big sham.
The actual definition of au·then·tic according to Websters dictionary is - not false or imitation : REAL, ACTUAL and - true to one's own personality, spirit, or character is sincere and authentic with no pretensions. Being authentic could be just walking around being a jerk to people and getting a free pass for doing so. It could even be walking thru your social circles with your head in the cloud never having a care in the world. It can be a kind and generous spirit that helps anyone that is in need. It can be a personal who is willing to listen to others or someone who makes people laugh. Authentic is different for each person. Some people are authentically jerks. It doesn't mean they are jerks all of the time but maybe they have a "thorn in their paw" and need some help getting it out. However in a world where we have to interact with other people and make relationships personally and professional, we have to be mindful of how your authenticity is perceived by others. It is constant work to make sure you are showing up to the world the way you want to be seen. Read that again "Show up to the world the way you want to be seen by others".
The best way to show your authentic self is to focus on the positive qualities that you have inside. Are you fun and energetic? Do you have a large sphere of influence to help others succeed? Do you have a positive way of looking at bad situations and making the day brighter? Are you thoughtful and kind to strangers? Do you welcome new people to a group and offer to show them around? Consider the qualities in others that you admire. Try to find those qualities in yourself. When you show up to the world around you with those positive qualities you will attract that same type of person to you. It is called the law of attraction. A wonderful book by Rhonda Byrne called - The Secret explains this concept very well. This book literally saved my life and got me through a very dark time in my life. We will save that story for another blog.
The benefits of making friends where ever you go is that you now have expanded your sphere of influence, branded yourself as someone who cares, and possibly brought joy into someones life. In my last 6-7 years marketing and networking in my community via my job and personal activities I have created a very large sphere of influence that creates my personal brand of being the go to person for ideas and connections. It is a great place to be in when you know you get to help so many people. Enjoy life, enjoy people, and walk thru life sharing ideas that deliver.